Santa Mormon

Last night we were reading out of the Book of Mormon Reader with the kids before bed. For those of you who don't know, this is a children's version of the Book of Mormon with pictures and stuff. We read a couple of chapters then told the kids it was time for bed. Addison said that she wasn't ready for bed yet and wanted to read another chapter. So I told her that we would read one more chapter and then she had to go to bed. She pointed at the picture on the next page and said "yeah, I want to read about Santa Mormon". It was actually a picture of Lehi, but he has a long white beard so what else is a 3 year old to think? I guess whatever works for now is good. I'm just glad she's interested in reading the scriptures. We'll keep working on the real reason.

Skate-A-Rama

Last week I took Addison skating for the first time with our good friend Lauren and her two daughters Zoey & Sidney. Addison was so excited to go but once she got on the floor and started wobbling around on her skates she was a little unsure of things. She was having a lot of fun at first and we got almost completely around the rink before she fell for the first time. It was pretty much over after that. She fell HARD on her poor little bum (she still has bruises). She got really upset and started crying and said that she didn't want to skate any more. So we took a little break and sat down for awhile until she was ready to try again. For the rest of the night she was kind of hot and cold. She would have fun skating until she fell and then she would say she was done for a little while. Unfortunately she's too much like her mother for her own good. She's usually a little leery of trying new things and if she's not perfect at it right off the bat then she doesn't want anything to do with it.

It was a really neat skating rink though. Pretty much anything with wheels was allowed on the floor. There were skaters, roller bladers, razor scooters, wheel chairs & strollers. Addison pushed Sidney around in her stroller for a little while and actually really enjoyed that because she had something to hold onto to help her balance.

I didn't get any pictures of Addison while she was skating because I was too busy trying to keep her upright so she wouldn't freak out. I made sure though that the pictures I got of her on the carousel (which was probably her favorite part anyway) had the skating rink in the background to prove that we really were at a skating rink! =)


Addison & Zoey

Lauren & Sidney (Aren't her girls adorable? They are such a fun family!)

What I've learned from my

SCARS!

The other day while I was cooking dinner I opened the oven door to pull a pan out. Once the pan was halfway out I heard a ruckus behind me and could tell that Urban and Bruno were running right towards the open oven. (They have issues, I am always yelling at them to get away from the hot oven. They never learn.) So I turned my body to shield them so they would not get burned and in the process I ended up burning my arm on the hot pan I was holding. It's a pretty good burn. It runs about four inches on the inside crease of my elbow. But thankfully they were both okay. When I showed Jared he said "man, I bet you'll think twice before doing that again!" (totally joking obviously). Because of course I would do it again in a heartbeat. I would take a burn or a bullet or whatever necessary in order to prevent one of my children or anyone else I love from getting hurt.

So this got me thinking. This may or may not leave a permanent scar, but for whatever duration of time it is visible it will be a reminder of what happened. I have a lot of scars, both physical and emotional, and they all serve as some sort of reminder of either a significant time in my life or a lesson I've learned. This particular scar will remind me of my love for my children and a mother's instincts to protect her children at any cost. I know, sounds a bit dramatic. I am aware that I didn't rescue him from a burning building or anything, but you get the gist.

Anyway, I've been having a really hard time lately with life in general. But I've finally come to the conclusion (after months of misery) that I've already been through a lot in my life and there will be a lot yet to come. What I'm going through now will definitely leave some emotional scarring but I'll just add it to the rest of them as one more life lesson learned and get on with the next chapter.

Here's some lessons I've learned from my scars...

Lots of scars on my knees from when I was a little girl...

Brings back many memories of playing with siblings and cousins in our backyards, learning how to ride a bike and skidding down an asphalt hill (on my knees) at the San Diego Wild Animal Park.

Lesson learned: You can get dirty, play rough and keep up with the boys and still be a girly girl!

2 beautiful scars on my tummy from c-sections...

Permanent reminders of two of the happiest memories I'll ever have. The uncomplicated births of my amazing and perfectly healthy daughter & son which some doctors told me would not be possible.

Lesson learned: Never give up and always have faith.

Other scars on tummy...

Reminders of a difficult time as a young, scared and confused teenager facing many tests & surgeries and feeling like the biggest freak on the planet.

Lesson learned: I am one tough cookie!!! And with the love & support of my family I can get through pretty much anything.

Knife scar on back...

Dumb reminder of jumping on a counter top to reach something on a high shelf and having a knife go into my back while jumping down.

Lesson learned: It's o.k. to ask for help sometimes. (I still have trouble with this one. I HATE when I can't do something on my own!)

Tiny scar on shoulder...

Reminder of a time when Jared & I were...well let's just say the bed broke. After all, this is a family blog.

Lesson learned: My husband and I are madly in love with each other! ;-) Also, perhaps we need a stronger bed and/or losing a few pounds couldn't hurt.

Irreparable scar on my heart from when my Grandpa Martin died...

I am so sad that my children will not have the opportunity to know this wonderful man in this lifetime but I am so grateful for the many memories I have of him. He taught me so much. He truly was the perfect grandpa.

Lesson learned: I am so truly blessed to have had the privilege of being his granddaughter and having him in my life for 23 years and having his memories forever.

The hardship I am having right now is not quite a scar yet. It is currently a gaping hole in my heart that I am just praying will close soon. We are losing our house in Arizona. I know that in the whole scheme of things this is not that big of a deal, but it is killing me inside. Of course I feel extremely blessed that we are all healthy and that Jared has a job but those are things that are out of my control. I am so sick of people telling me that lots of people are going through this right now and that it's just a house. My heart goes out to everyone else in this situation, but that doesn't make it any easier. To me it is not just a house. It's everything a house represents...security, safety, love, peace of mind, etc. and I am losing that. To me, losing this house equals a BIG FAT FAILURE! Anybody who knows me knows that I am extremely hard on myself. It's something I'm trying to change, but I'm just not quite sure how. My entire life I've never been great at anything, but one thing about me is that I don't fail. HOLLIE DOES NOT FAIL! Now this isn't because I'm perfect by any means but because unfortunately if I even think that I won't be good at something I won't even try because I don't want to risk failing. And once I do get involved in something I work my butt off to make sure that I accomplish it. Well, guess what? I FAILED! Losing our house is a huge failure in my mind. Now for the good news!

Lesson learned: As already stated, with the love and support of my family and the gospel, I can get through anything and this too will pass. But even better than that, I've gained a new outlook on life. With one failure under my belt what's a few more? So I've decided that I'm going to stop being such a chicken and I'm going to start living. I'm going to try things that have always sounded like fun but I've been too scared to try because I thought I might fail. I want to find something I really enjoy doing even if I'm terrible at it. I promise to keep you all posted on my progress.

Now, the purpose of this post was not to have a pity party and certainly not so everyone could leave me comments on how I'm not a failure (seriously, I don't want to hear those. Although I know Heather will have some funny comment on how she knew I was a loser the minute she laid eyes on me, just to make me laugh). In reality I just needed to get some of this out of my head so I could get past it. Also, I wanted some help from all of you. I want to hear things that you all enjoy doing. They can be things you've done forever, something you just discovered, things you tried and you're great at, things you tried and you're bad at or things you thought you would absolutely hate but ended up falling in love with. Whatever it is I just want to hear about it. Thanks for your help.

So, anyone up for skydiving with me??? =)

Thank You Bom Bom!

'Cuz you're the bomb baby, bomb baby. I think that's a song, maybe I just made it up. Who knows?

Addison was super excited because she got packages in the mail two days in a row. She feels pretty special. Now she's going to expect something everyday. =)

My mom sent her some adorable clothes that she made for her. She is SO TALENTED! This stuff is so darn cute. She made a jumper dress with a matching coat, hat & scarf and a very chic zebra print coat & hat set. She loves them! She couldn't wait to put them all on at the same time.

I've included pictures of the jumper & accessories but I'll post pictures of the zebra coat later. We took those pictures together with Avery because she has a matching giraffe print coat. They look absolutely ADORABLE!

Thanks again grandma.